Volfonrig is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, annoying deer.

Volfonrig created an up quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Volfonrig, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Volfonrig, he will come to you in dreams.

Volfonrig's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Volfonrig's Holy Commandments

1. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never sit near voles.

3. Do not take Volfonrig's name in vain.

4. Erect five titanium sculptures of Volfonrig on top of important buildings.

5. Erect a large gold sculpture of Volfonrig on top of all buildings.