Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, pitiless jackal.

Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod created the Large Magellanic Cloud five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod, it will make you grow a tail.

Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in the presence of monkeys.

2. Yamtarphugkemhabnanwod loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Sheep are not to be trusted.