Bonkarnwat is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, contented crab.

Bonkarnwat created the Sun two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonkarnwat, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bonkarnwat, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Bonkarnwat's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Bonkarnwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about photosynthesis.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never sing in the presence of bats.

5. Do not hurt rats.