Ominfutran is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, temperamental hummingbird.

Ominfutran created viruses nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ominfutran, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Ominfutran, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Ominfutran's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Ominfutran's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near pigs.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Do not eat figs.

4. Do not speak about parsnips.

5. Never think about special relativity near mites while wearing brown trousers and balancing three tin spheres on your head.