Vagjamcem is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, awesome swan.

Vagjamcem created the Sol system three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vagjamcem, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vagjamcem, he will cry a lot.

Vagjamcem's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Vagjamcem's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never talk about nebulae.

3. Vagjamcem must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.