Wadort is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, wise grasshopper.

Wadort created oxygen three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wadort, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Wadort, he will turn you into a duck.

Wadort's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Wadort's Holy Commandments

1. Learn six new languages a year.

2. Never think about planets.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Always look after injured birds.