Dagkomcat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, two-faced jaguar.

Dagkomcat created dark energy four years ago.

If you believe in Dagkomcat, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dagkomcat, she will turn you into a goat.

Dagkomcat's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Dagkomcat's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always treat voles with great respect.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never pour water over plants.