Cantonkflan is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, benevolent cat.

Cantonkflan created a Higgs boson two billion years ago.

If you believe in Cantonkflan, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cantonkflan, he will destroy your home planet.

Cantonkflan's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Cantonkflan's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never think about thermodynamics near aardvarks while wearing cyan jumpers and balancing three gold spheres on your head.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not wear carbon on your body.

5. Never eat bread.