Rillstipbonk is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, annoying cow.

Rillstipbonk created viruses four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rillstipbonk, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Rillstipbonk, she will refuse to believe in you.

Rillstipbonk's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Rillstipbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter near pigs while wearing green scarves and balancing nine tin spheres on your head.

2. Always look after injured capybaras.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.

4. Never chant near snails.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.