Shavsinbopvin is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, resourceful swallow.

Shavsinbopvin created a charm quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavsinbopvin, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Shavsinbopvin, it will destroy your favourite star.

Shavsinbopvin's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Shavsinbopvin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

2. Never talk about asteroids.

3. Never feed peanuts to dolphins while wearing purple corsets.

4. Never sing near goats.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.