Fligbagbess is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, emotional dolphin.

Fligbagbess created dark energy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fligbagbess, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fligbagbess, he will be very unhappy.

Fligbagbess' most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Fligbagbess' Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large gold sculpture of Fligbagbess on top of all buildings.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never eat aubergines.

4. Run away from blue snails, for they are unholy.

5. Fligbagbess loves ants, so they must be honoured.