Larp is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, uncaring zebra.

Larp created the planet Mars two million years ago.

If you believe in Larp, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Larp, it will not invite you to parties.

Larp's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Larp's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Larp on top of all buildings.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never wear shorts.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Put Larp first in all things.