Zigflisont is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, temperamental zebra.

Zigflisont created humankind six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zigflisont, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zigflisont, she will turn you into a duck.

Zigflisont's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Zigflisont's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near grasshopers.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always help sick aardvarks.

4. Never feed lots of carrots to rats while wearing black dresses.

5. Never look at black holes.