Quimdavcut is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, impressive meerkat.

Quimdavcut created water eight million years ago.

If you believe in Quimdavcut, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Quimdavcut, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Quimdavcut's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Quimdavcut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always help sick monkeys.

3. Never talk about birds.

4. Always help snakes in need.

5. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.