Tetti is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, resourceful toad.

Tetti created silver five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tetti, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Tetti, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tetti's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Tetti's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight monkeys approach from the north.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Run away from pink foxes, for they are unholy.

5. Never think ill of sick gulls.