Bentigkad is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, charitable troll.

Bentigkad created an up quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bentigkad, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bentigkad, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Bentigkad's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Bentigkad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Erect four gold sculptures of Bentigkad on top of important buildings.

4. Never paint your neck yellow.

5. Always help sick tortoises.