Jigpomtin is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, uncaring chinchilla.

Jigpomtin created the Sun six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jigpomtin, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jigpomtin, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Jigpomtin's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Jigpomtin's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt porpoises.

2. Never think about quantum gravity near tortoises while wearing red dresses and balancing eight titanium spheres on your arms.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think ill of sick foxes.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.