Wipfonsand is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, capable raccoon.

Wipfonsand created time and space three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wipfonsand, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wipfonsand, he will turn you into a plant.

Wipfonsand's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Wipfonsand's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always help grasshopers.

5. Do not covet oxen.