Tifyogbass is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unthoughtful grasshopper.

Tifyogbass created the Sol system three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tifyogbass, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tifyogbass, she will cry a lot.

Tifyogbass' most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Tifyogbass' Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Tifyogbass.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Always wear black.

4. Never think ill of sick frogs.

5. Never think about quantum field theory near great tits while wearing magenta corsets and balancing four carbon spheres on your neck.