Panghunhud is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, boastful mongoose.

Panghunhud created Europe two million years ago.

If you believe in Panghunhud, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Panghunhud, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Panghunhud's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Panghunhud's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never write about eukaryotes.

3. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Panghunhud in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never mention badgers.

5. Do not wear green clothing.