Nuttfedsab is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, fast crocodile.

Nuttfedsab created viruses two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuttfedsab, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nuttfedsab, she will turn you into a goat.

Nuttfedsab's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Nuttfedsab's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured squirrels.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Learn eight new languages a year.

4. Never talk about rats.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.