Fedlimnad is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, effective octopus.

Fedlimnad created a photon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fedlimnad, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fedlimnad, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fedlimnad's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Fedlimnad's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near otters while wearing fawn trousers and balancing three copper spheres on your hands.

4. Fedlimnad loves ants, so they must be respected.

5. Do not commit murder.