Cudwitgam is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, sage narwhal.

Cudwitgam created oxygen five million years ago.

If you believe in Cudwitgam, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cudwitgam, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cudwitgam's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Cudwitgam's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always obey Cudwitgam's priests.

3. Never go into violet rooms.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.