Hudgonwon is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, idiotic hummingbird.

Hudgonwon created humankind six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hudgonwon, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Hudgonwon, he will be very sad.

Hudgonwon's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Hudgonwon's Holy Commandments

1. Dolphins are not to be trusted.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near porpoises while wearing black shorts and balancing five carbon spheres on your face.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Hudgonwon loves voles, so they must be honoured.