Bamfombam is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, wise goblin.

Bamfombam created Asia nine million years ago.

If you believe in Bamfombam, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bamfombam, he will cry a lot.

Bamfombam's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Bamfombam's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never skip in holy places.

3. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never write about asteroids.