Cepmumjop is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unselfish donkey.

Cepmumjop created a photon two million years ago.

If you believe in Cepmumjop, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Cepmumjop, he will be mildly annoyed.

Cepmumjop's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Cepmumjop's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

3. Cepmumjop must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.