Fentonknat is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, idiotic dryad.

Fentonknat created gold eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fentonknat, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fentonknat, it will turn you into a frog.

Fentonknat's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Fentonknat's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fentonknat.

2. Never chant in the presence of tapirs.

3. Never write about spacetime.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Retreat if eight nematodes approach from the west.