Sigbosshak is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, effective jackal.

Sigbosshak created a photon eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigbosshak, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sigbosshak, he will turn you into a dog.

Sigbosshak's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Sigbosshak's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Never look at dwarf planets.

3. Do not trade with those who eat melons.

4. Hide if four geese approach from the north.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.