Nuttmifkem is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, awe-inspiring mink.

Nuttmifkem created the universe three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuttmifkem, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Nuttmifkem, he will turn you into a duck.

Nuttmifkem's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Nuttmifkem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about spinach.

2. Feed all hungry squirrels.

3. Never think about enzymes.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Always take life seriously.