Jopdunhom is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, annoying gerbil.

Jopdunhom created a quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jopdunhom, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Jopdunhom, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Jopdunhom's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Jopdunhom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not speak about tomatoes.

3. Never paint your legs green.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. You must love Jopdunhom.
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