Hivrapwan is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, quiet guinea pig.

Hivrapwan created an electron seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Hivrapwan, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hivrapwan, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Hivrapwan's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Hivrapwan's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your back brown.

2. Hide from cyan nematodes for they are unholy.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

5. Never talk about porpoises.