Fomtonkrot Sasfenbed is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, smart pig.

Fomtonkrot Sasfenbed created the cosmos eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fomtonkrot Sasfenbed, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fomtonkrot Sasfenbed, she will destroy your home planet.

Fomtonkrot Sasfenbed's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Fomtonkrot Sasfenbed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never think about electromagnetism.