Lunxemhog is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, merciless centaur.

Lunxemhog created Africa eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lunxemhog, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Lunxemhog, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Lunxemhog's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Lunxemhog's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate snails.

3. You must love Lunxemhog.

4. Do not keep seven frogs in a large pit.

5. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.