Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid is a god.

He takes the form of a small, thoughtless owl.

Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid created a down quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid, he will turn you into a frog.

Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

2. Feed all hungry porpoises.

3. Cipwanbestnadxuckyogfonlid loves monkeys, so they must be respected.

4. Learn four new languages a year.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.