Zimhudfum is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, unthinking scorpion.

Zimhudfum created silver four million years ago.

If you believe in Zimhudfum, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zimhudfum, it will turn you into a hamster.

Zimhudfum's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Zimhudfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Doves are not to be trusted.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never chant in holy places.