Rilkadkip is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, blissful frog.

Rilkadkip created a bottom quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rilkadkip, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Rilkadkip, he will not care.

Rilkadkip's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Rilkadkip's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five nematodes approach from the north.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.