Yakpadkabarttabnanceb is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, awe-inspiring finch.

Yakpadkabarttabnanceb created matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Yakpadkabarttabnanceb, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Yakpadkabarttabnanceb, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Yakpadkabarttabnanceb's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Yakpadkabarttabnanceb's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate swans.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Erect seven gold sculptures of Yakpadkabarttabnanceb on top of important buildings.