Cimfatgud is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, caring giraffe.

Cimfatgud created a down quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cimfatgud, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cimfatgud, she will manifest in front of you.

Cimfatgud's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Cimfatgud's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into pink rooms.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not take Cimfatgud's name in vain.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Fast once a month.