Fobmingepgar is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, all-knowing seal.

Fobmingepgar created Asia eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fobmingepgar, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fobmingepgar, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Fobmingepgar's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Fobmingepgar's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about eukaryotes.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Always make sure there are no snakes in a room before entering it.

5. Never eat grapes.