Batbogjarnortgedsadarf is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, conceited crab.

Batbogjarnortgedsadarf created Mount Everest two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Batbogjarnortgedsadarf, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Batbogjarnortgedsadarf, he will laugh at you.

Batbogjarnortgedsadarf's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Batbogjarnortgedsadarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near voles while wearing orange scarves and balancing six carbon spheres on your head.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Batbogjarnortgedsadarf loves snails, so they must be respected.

4. Never paint your arms cyan.

5. Pray towards the east.