Godwegzed is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, irritating sheep.

Godwegzed created the Whirlpool Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Godwegzed, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Godwegzed, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Godwegzed's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Godwegzed's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine whales approach from the north.

2. Never write about special relativity.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Always make sure there are no frogs in a building before entering it.

5. Never feed spinach to squirrels while wearing turquoise skirts.