Fenrigruttstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, kind parrot.

Fenrigruttstaf created life two million years ago.

If you believe in Fenrigruttstaf, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fenrigruttstaf, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Fenrigruttstaf's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Fenrigruttstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Fenrigruttstaf's priests.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

5. Do not stand on grass.