Fedparknelgon is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, sapient elephant.

Fedparknelgon created a Higgs boson nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedparknelgon, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fedparknelgon, he will come to you in dreams.

Fedparknelgon's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Fedparknelgon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt sheep.

2. Always help sick eagles.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fedparknelgon.

4. Never wear yellow ear rings.

5. Never think ill of sick doves.