Weelenrill Femxuctagnad is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, moody badger.

Weelenrill Femxuctagnad created dark matter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Weelenrill Femxuctagnad, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Weelenrill Femxuctagnad, it will turn you into a dog.

Weelenrill Femxuctagnad's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Weelenrill Femxuctagnad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near seals while wearing pink stockings and balancing five carbon spheres on your head.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Put Weelenrill Femxuctagnad first in all things.

5. Never go into blue rooms.