Gumtettitetti is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, stupid centaur.

Gumtettitetti created oxygen three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gumtettitetti, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gumtettitetti, she will curse you with boils.

Gumtettitetti's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Gumtettitetti's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

4. You must never eat garlic.

5. Do not commit murder.