Staftigvil is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, temperamental hare.

Staftigvil created the Virgo Supercluster seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Staftigvil, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Staftigvil, it will turn you into a plant.

Staftigvil's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Staftigvil's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not kill mites.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always look after injured pigs.

5. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.