Gumbemzag is a god.
It takes the form of a blubbery, happy
whale.
Gumbemzag created the cosmos eight quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Gumbemzag, it will grant all your wishes.
If you do not believe in
Gumbemzag, it will be very unhappy.
Gumbemzag's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.
Gumbemzag's Holy Commandments1. Do not shave your neck.
2. Do not take Gumbemzag's name in vain.
3. Never talk about galaxies.
4. Never pour water over plants.
5. Never paint your feet magenta.