Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, proud jackal.

Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg created the planet Earth two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Never wear blue corsets.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. You must pray to Kendibbenyarp Fongemtit Sandsogmeg seven times a day.

5. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.