Flowbunvan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, uncaring beaver.

Flowbunvan created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Flowbunvan, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Flowbunvan, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Flowbunvan's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Flowbunvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear tights.

2. Do not keep seven foxes in a large pit.

3. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

4. Feed all hungry shrews.

5. Always wear brown.