Titwadcip Flatortrap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, passionate dragon.

Titwadcip Flatortrap created dark matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Titwadcip Flatortrap, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Titwadcip Flatortrap, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Titwadcip Flatortrap's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Titwadcip Flatortrap's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt foxes.

2. Do not take Titwadcip Flatortrap's name in vain.

3. Never talk about swans.

4. Never feed peanuts to eagles while wearing shorts.

5. Never talk about fluid mechanics near goats while wearing pink skirts.